Emerging Scholar Syndrome

A short burst today as I am in the midst of writing a conference paper, but I had to just write this down and throw it into the universe. As a baby academic I still feel (and wonder if it will ever go away) mildly anxious while preparing to share my own research with others. I hate the thought of writing it, I postponed for two hours this morning claiming I was too tired to focus (when really I wanted to listen to the Q on CBC instead), and then got up begrudgingly to make coffee and sit down to write a paper about something I love. The moment I finished the first paragraph (thirty seconds ago) I realized that the build-up to writing the thing is what scares me, not the thing itself. I love the thing, I love my research, I love the conferences I present at and I love the idea that people are going to listen to me and ask questions. It’s the thoughts that are scary, not the thing itself. I forget this prior to writing everything I will share, and just wish there were some constructive ways to combat that? Any thoughts from the peanut gallery? Because there comes a time in one’s academic life when they realize this is what they are going to be doing forever, and so there has to be a way to stop the anxiety of writing because this is what I love to do.

This is it, I’ve made it, but why is it so hard to start?
xx Jess

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2 thoughts on “Emerging Scholar Syndrome

  1. Regarding getting that first paragraph on paper (or on the screen), picture one person and write to them. Explain to that one person why you are exploring this topic and why it is important. Then share your thoughts and insights with that person. Answer the questions you think they might ask. You don’t have to send your notes or finished paper to that person, so they can be someone famous, alive or historical, or completely imaginary. It works for me.

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